A ray of light

A few months ago, the most remarkable story appeared in the media. A breakthrough had been found in a potential cure for HIV: a new way to force the virus out of hiding inside human cells.

This is nothing short of a medical miracle; by all accounts it left researchers feeling ‘overwhelmed’. It was the culmination of years of work.

But, just 24 hours later, this story had vanished below the waterline of economic doom-mongering, mindless bloodshed and the relentless, horrifying reality TV show of the Trump presidency.

Despair is normal

Take a cursory look at almost any digital media outlet or TV news channel, and the basis for despair seems clear. Economically, too, things have been tough for a long time now – inflationary headwinds remain stubborn, confidence low, productivity difficult to find.

Then there is the stuff of life, which comes for us all. Illness, financial worries, family issues. As a client said to me recently, “it feels like a lot, and it always feels like a lot, but now it really feels like a lot, do you get me?”

I did, and I do. Feeling overwhelmed, frightened – even despairing – is a part of the human condition. We do not get to evade these emotions. Indeed, the world is designed to prompt them to arise in us. The question is how we manage them.

I have been in therapy for a long time now. Several years ago, when I was in the pit of despair and struggling to find anything good to say about anything, my therapist said something insightful to me:

“Look for the darkness anywhere and you will find it. The same is also true of the light.”

Paying attention

Here’s an incomplete list of difficult things that have happened in my working life in the last ten or so years:

• I got, in effect, forced out of the consultancy I’d co-founded, without payoff, and then saw it sold for a seven-figure sum
• Our accountants gave us some bad advice, which left us owing a lot of money to HMRC
• Our accountants then lied about the nature of that advice, lied about the fact that they even offered advice of that sort (despite having invoiced us for it), and fired us as a client when we started asking questions
• At around the same time, my businesses got hit by two lots of client bad debt, leaving us nearly broke
• Despite doing all I could to help them, a client business went under
• I started a new business of my own on the basis of extensive research, only to see it fail and cost a six-figure sum
• In the last six months alone, my practices have been ghosted four times by prospects who in each case had told us we had won their business

I cannot pretend that despair hasn’t been my reaction to a lot of this. It’s not hard for me to look for and find the darkness in that list.

Then again, if I look for the light, I can find it:

• If I had not been forced out of my consultancy, I would not have founded Corporate Punk or Phil Lewis Associates, or do this work that brings so much meaning and joy into my life
• Getting shafted by our accountants forced me to find a new firm, from which a new network of contacts sprung
• Going through the bad debt experience has helped me to empathise with those going through similar challenges of their own
• The client whose business went under has gone on to flourish in the most remarkable ways – and we remain in close contact to this day
• My failed business initiative brought new friends into my life and got me going with podcasting (more on this below)
• The experience of being ghosted has helped me to continue prioritising human connection – including launching a new business network in my home city

It’s a question of where I train my attention.

Hope is essential

Like energy, hope is a prerequisite of any sort of success in business.

If we cannot find a reason to believe that things can and will get better, we will not find the wherewithal in ourselves to create that future state. Conversely, if we can locate something positive on which to breathe the oxygen of our energy – even just a small spark of possibility – then we create the capacity for things to improve.

The central problem we face is evolutionary in nature: negativity bias means that ascribe way more weight to bad news than good. This is because there’s a limit to how happy we can be but we can only die once.

But there’s a reason why ’training our attention’ is a commonly-used phrase. We have a choice about where we focus, and into what thoughts we breathe life.

Take story of the HIV breakthrough I mentioned earlier. It was there, then it wasn’t. But gone doesn’t need to mean forgotten: it can remain a beacon of hope to those of us who care about this issue if we continue to train our attention in a positive direction.

Staying grounded

The Stockdale Paradox suggests that in any difficult situation, the route to survival (and eventual success) lies in doing two things at the same time: facing the full horror of your predicament, no matter how difficult doing so might be, and remaining wholly optimistic that things can and will improve. (The paradox comes from the fact that doing one thing should preclude the other.)

When we talk about hope, it is not to suggest that the way forward is to embrace a happy-clappy Teletubby-esque view of the future. The road ahead might indeed be difficult, and life is always what happens while we are busy making other plans.

The job for us all, then, is to keep our feet on the ground but find one thing – that small spark or that faintly glowing ember – which represents a reason to believe that the future can be better. 

Then we must train our attention on it. Breathe oxygen into it. Watch it grow.

Going deeper

If hope feels in short supply, and you are interested in learning how to cultivate it during tough times, you might be interested in my new podcast, launching soon.

In the first half of the show, I’ll be talking with a leader about a gnarly problem they hit head-on. It might be a failed initiative, a badly behaved Board, business performance problems or even a painful exit. We’ll explore what happened, how they got through it and what they learned. And we’ll do so with honesty, clarity and perspective.

In the second half, I’ll be working with another coach or consultant to explore some of the broader themes raised in the first, with the aim of pulling out practical insights for real-world application.

Like all my work, it’s a labour of love – and it’s also part of my ongoing work to train my attention on what matters. I hope that it helps you too.

Listen to the trailer and subscribe >

If you’d like to discuss how to recover a sense of hope and possibility in your company – alone or with your leadership team – please get in touch.

PS If you’re interested in how you activate hope across your business – and get energy moving in the right direction – you might find value in my Energy Sessions. Take a look here.

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